Trauma is defined as any type of distressing event or experience that can have an impact on a person’s ability to cope and function. This can include physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, death of a loved one, witnessing a death, and more. Trauma can have emotional, psychological, or physical effects. When trauma goes unresolved, it’s effects can be long-lasting.
So, what are the signs of unresolved trauma, and how do you resolve it?
Signs of unresolved trauma
Physical Signs of Trauma
The effects of trauma can be stored in the body. Some physical symptoms that trauma can manifest include:
Trouble sleeping
Increased heart rate
Tense muscles
Sexual dysfunction
Body aches
Avoiding Memories
Traumatic experiences leave individuals with painful memories. It is normal to not want to think about or remember those painful memories. However, if you notice that you are putting a significant amount of energy and effort into avoiding the painful memories, that may be a sign that you have not resolved the trauma. When trauma has been resolved, most people can choose when to think about the memories of the traumatic event.
Struggling to Trust
If you have unresolved trauma, you may have a difficult time trusting others the way you did before the traumatic experience. Your sense of safety and connection to others may be negatively altered. You may be on edge constantly expecting the next painful event. If you experienced childhood trauma, you may have never felt able to trust others. Children depend fully on their caregivers to provide protection and safety. When caregivers fail to meet our needs, trust issues can arise. Adults who experienced childhood trauma often feel that intimacy is dangerous and no one can be trusted.
Experiencing Really Big Emotions for Smaller Incidents
When you have unresolved trauma, you may have an intense emotional response to smaller triggers. A trigger is a person, place, situation, or feeling that elicits a stress-based emotional or physical response because of past trauma. When your brain detects a threat, or trigger, your body’s response may cause you to go into fight, flight, or freeze. In fight or flight, your body becomes highly activated and overwhelmed. This may cause you to be aggressive, panic, shake, or make negative assumptions. When your body freezes, it goes into a very different state which may result in refusal to engage, substance use, difficulty remembering details, or depression.
Discomfort With Stability / Seeking Conflict in Relationships
Individuals who have experienced significant trauma may feel uncomfortable in a stable relationship. When individuals feel chronically unsafe and untrusting in relationships, they may desperately crave healthy connection but also feel fearful and uncomfortable with health connection and pull away.
How to resolve trauma
Find a Trauma-Informed Therapist
Trauma-informed therapists are aware of the impact of trauma on an individual’s emotions, body, behavior, and ability to cope. Trauma-informed therapists will integrate this knowledge into their interventions to fit the needs of the individual. During sessions, trauma-informed therapists will create a space of safety, trustworthiness, collaboration, and empowerment. They will also understand the effects of intergenerational trauma and how culture affects how an individual copes with trauma.
Get Educated About How Trauma Affects You and Your Relationships
There are many books and resources that exist that can help educate you on the effects of trauma and how to find healing. Some resources we recommend are
The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk
Changes that Heal: The Four Shifts That Make Everything Better…That Anyone Can Do by Henry Cloud
Trauma-Informed Therapy in Austin, Texas
Neema Counseling has multiple trauma-informed therapists who integrate knowledge about how trauma impacts an individual into their sessions. Our counselors provide a nonjudgmental and safe environment to help individuals resolve trauma they have experienced. To make an appointment with one of our trauma-informed counselors, head over here.